To Hate those you love JamesxPeter
by kusanosakura
Summary: Peter is alone amoung his friends; he feels replaced by Sirius as James' best mate, James is head-over-heels in love with Lily Evans and he is suspicious that Remus and Sirius are lovers. No one loves Peter...he is being forgotten...left behind...


Title: To hate those you love

Fandom: Harry Potter

Pairings: One sided PeterxJames, JamesxLily, RemusxSirius

Rating: Umm…

Notes: Why Peter would turn on James…this is the question everyone ever Remus and Sirius wanted to know. I'm sure Severus would love to know why Peter would have endangered Lily as well, considering that Snape loved Lily but lost her due to his word choice and death eater status.

I've always been there for him, until the train to Hogwarts I had been his best mate. Then he met the Wolf and Sirius Sodding Black. I went from his confidant to his shadow…he also claimed to have met the love of his life that day. Merlin, I hate Lily Evans more then I hate Sirius. Remus is hard to hate…he helps me study. When he isn't staring at Sirius like the Playboy of Gryffindor was an expensive rare steak, I swear sometimes he thinks Sirius…

I shouldn't say anything…because I'm in love with the one person I will never have; James Potter, my best mate. He is an arrogant prat who takes too much joy in mischief making, rule-breaking and Snivellus-baiting but I still love him. He was a different person when we were kids…still funny but put him with Sirius and everything is magnified. I want to hate Sirius for stealing my best mate but the best Gryffindor beater in a decade has saved me more times then I can count from creepy evil Slytherin snakes like Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle and Sirius' little brother Regulus. They think picking and bulling the weakest of the Marauders is a game. Remus is far more muscular then one might expect because he is a bookworm whose grades fluctuate with Lily's for top marks while I struggle. Why is Remus so Bloody strong? Because he is a werewolf, James and Sirius are on the Gryffindor Quidditch Team.

Me? I'm just the rat in their shadows these days…I wish I were braver, sometimes I think I should have been a Hufflepuff because compared to them I'm useless…

With James eternally chasing after Evans, Sirius sleepwalking into Remus' bed most nights- hell, Sirius spent the entire night of the full moon with Remus while James and I sneak back in after a few hours of romping in the Forbidden Forest. Sirius would come back with new scratches he'd try to hide and would chug potions. He let them think he was a failure at potions because if he was 'failing' they would have to help him. If he actually tried he could show them all up, he was just as good at potions as Sirius. If he was paired with Sirius he made sure they had a perfect potion, if he was with the others well…he didn't much care.

He ached, burned, craved James…but all James could talk about was their next prank, Lily or how to torment Snivellus.

He was more and more sure that Sirius and Remus were involved…

The way they looked at each other, they talked in whispers only to fall silent when they were no longer alone. Why couldn't he have that with James? Why did no one ever want Peter? The bloody werewolf had a lover but not Wormtail. No one could be bothered with

Lily had beautiful hair, kissable lips and a kindness that reminded James of his mother. She was also highly protective of Snivellus…

Those were James' words, when you put pudgy watery eyed weak Peter next to Perfect Lily Evans who would want Peter?

Peter lay silently sobbing in their shared dorm room, no one even asked him out to spend more time with the better looking members of the Marauders.

He was distained by everyone…he didn't know where to turn. He just wanted to be appreciated…to be loved and he might as well be invisible to James.

His dreams were always filled with James…he slept with Silencing charms on his bed. He would hate to wake his friends screaming for James…

Was there anyone who would appreciate Wormtail? Or was he doomed to the shadows because he wasn't good enough?


End file.
